Forever You Read online

  I’ve never seen Holton act like he did tonight. The last time I saw him he was so quiet and reserved. But now I know what he’s really like. It’s another Kensington family secret. Just when I think I know everything about this family, I find out something new. And it’s usually not good.

  Aside from the incident with Holton, I had a good time this weekend and as Garret and I are lying in bed, I feel a little sad we’re leaving tomorrow.

  “This has been a good trip,” I say, resting my head on his chest.

  “It has, hasn’t it? I actually had fun.”

  “Same here. Your dad’s been really great and I got to spend lots of time with Lilly. I can’t wait to see her at our wedding. She’ll be so cute with her little basket of flowers.”

  “Yeah, she will. And afterward you’ll have a little sister.”

  “Well, technically I already have four sisters. Half-sisters at least.” I adjust myself in the bed, pulling the covers up higher.

  “Do you ever wish you could tell them who you are?”

  “Sometimes I do. It would be nice to have more family but they’d never accept me. When I met Sadie’s mom, she didn’t like me and I’m sure she’d hate me if she knew who I really was.”

  “Maybe you could meet your uncle. Have you asked Grace about that?”

  “Yes and she said it’s up to me. If I want to meet him, she said she’ll arrange it. But I don’t know if I want to yet.”

  “Did Grace decide if she’s coming to the wedding?”

  Grace Sinclair, my grandmother, is a billionaire and because of that, she’s kind of well-known, at least among wealthy people. She was hesitant about going to the wedding because if someone found out and told the press, people would question why she was there. But then she realized she could just say she’s friends with the Kensington family, which is true. She’s been seen at social events with them for years and the media knows that Pearce was a big supporter of Royce’s presidential campaign.

  “She’ll definitely be at the wedding. I talked to her last week. She invited us to come stay at her house in Santa Barbara. She’ll only be there for a few weeks. She thought maybe we could go there sometime after the wedding, just for a day or two. I told her I’d check with you and get back to her.”

  “Jade, you don’t have to check with me. If you want to go, we’ll go.”

  “Really? Because I was thinking I’d just go alone. I didn’t think you’d want to go. You don’t really know her that well.”

  “I know her well enough. I grew up seeing her at parties. It doesn’t matter. We’ll be married by then and I go where you go. That’s how it works. And I’ll make you go to my family functions.”

  “I don’t want us to make each other do stuff we don’t want to do.”

  “I’m kidding. You’re not making me go. I want to go. Grace seems like a nice lady and she’s your grandmother. You need to spend time with her. And I want to get to know her better.”

  I lift my head up and smile at him. “You know what?”

  “What?”

  “I’m so ready to marry you. I just want the day to hurry up and get here.”

  “And this from the girl who used to freak out whenever I said the word marriage.” He kisses me. “Goodnight. I love you.”

  I lay my head back on his chest and secure my arm around him. “I love you, too.”

  The next morning while I’m in the bathroom getting ready, I hear Pearce come into the bedroom. Garret’s in there packing our bags.

  “Garret, I want to talk to you before you leave.” Pearce has a deep powerful voice that’s loud even when he’s talking normally. I have the bathroom door closed and I can still hear him perfectly.

  “What is it?” I hear Garret ask. “Why are you looking at me that way?”

  “Let’s sit down.”

  I was just about to go out into the bedroom but decide not to because his dad sounds really serious and I’m afraid to interrupt. So I stay put and try to occupy myself. I try not to listen but I can hear every word through the bathroom door.

  “Is something wrong?” Garret asks.

  “No, nothing’s wrong. I just need to say something to you.” There’s silence and then I hear Pearce again. “I just want to say that I’m sorry, Garret. I’m sorry for being a bad father to you all these years. For not being there for you after your mother died.”

  “Um, okay. But why are you—”

  “Let me finish. I need to say this.” There silence again and then, “I was selfish. I couldn’t deal with your mother’s death and because of that, I didn’t handle it well. I didn’t handle you well. I tried to force you to move on and not talk about her or even mention her name. But that was all for my sake. And it was wrong.”

  “It’s okay, Dad. It was a long time ago.”

  “No. It’s not okay. After she died, I should’ve spent time with you. I should’ve supported you and been there for you while you were grieving. But I wasn’t. And so you turned to alcohol, and deep down I knew I was the reason for that but instead of admitting that, I blamed you. I said you were a bad kid. Rebellious. Out of control. But the alcohol was just an outlet for the pain I caused you and the pain of losing your mother. I get that now.”

  “Where is this coming from?” Garret asks. “Why are you telling me this?”

  “I’ve been seeing someone. A counselor. For several months now actually. Obviously I can’t tell him everything about me or this family. I talk to him mainly about your mother and her death. And you. I didn’t need him to tell me I’ve been a bad father. I knew that already. But I needed to know why. Because I don’t want to be this way, Garret. I want to be the kind of father you and Lilly deserve. You’re a grown man now, so maybe you don’t want that. Maybe you hate me for how I’ve treated you all these years but—”

  “I don’t hate you, Dad.”

  “Well, I would understand if you did. But if you could give me another chance, I’d like to try to be part of your life again. I know you’re on the other side of the country now but I don’t want the distance to drive us even farther apart. I don’t want to lose you, Garret. I’ll do whatever I can to fix this, make things right between us again. I’d like to have more weekends like we just had. I want you and Jade to come here to the house whenever you’d like and to feel welcome when you do. I’ll deal with Katherine. She won’t be a problem. And I’d like to make some trips out to California this year to see you and Jade.”

  “You should come out a few days before the wedding,” Garret says.

  “Yes, that’s a good idea.” Pearce laughs a little. “It’s hard to believe my son is getting married in a couple weeks. Next I’ll be a grandfather.”

  Garret doesn’t respond. I’m sure he hasn’t told his dad about my fear of having kids.

  His dad lets out a long sigh and his serious tone returns. “I also need to say that . . . I love you. I know I’ve never told you that and it’s another thing I regret. It’s difficult for me to say those words because my father never said them to me and I’m sure he never will. But I don’t want to repeat his mistakes.”

  “I love you, too, Dad.” It gets quiet and I assume they’re hugging but I’m not sure.

  I’m sitting on the floor waiting for them to finish and trying to remain quiet as tears run down my face. It’s one of those stupid crying-because-you’re-happy moments that I can’t stand, but my eyes are doing it anyway because I’m so damn happy Pearce is finally stepping up and being a good father and saying the things Garret so desperately needs to hear.

  Pearce doesn’t need to give us a wedding present. This is it. This is the best gift he could’ve given us.

  CHAPTER TWELVE

  12

  I hear noises and it sounds like they’re getting up. Pearce starts talking again. “I’m really proud of you, Garret. You turned your life around this year and you did it all on your own.”

  “I didn’t do it on my own. Jade is the reason I changed. Or she was at least the inspirat
ion that got me to change.”

  “It’s funny how one person can have such an effect on your life, isn’t it?” He doesn’t wait for Garret to answer. “Actually Jade is the one who got me thinking about all of this.”

  “All of what?”

  “About being a better father to you and Lilly.”

  “Why? What did Jade do?”

  He clears his throat, then waits before speaking again. “When you were shot and lying on the floor, you should have seen her. She thought she was losing you. She was screaming, crying, begging for you to be okay. Watching her, I finally realized how much she loved you. But it disturbed me that I wasn’t reacting the same way. You’re my son and you were lying there, blood pouring from your chest, and this girl who had only known you a few months was more worried about you than I was. Soon after that happened, I decided I needed to talk to someone and figure out what was going on with me. But I never would’ve done it if it weren’t for seeing Jade’s reaction that day.” He pauses. “Seeing you two together reminds me of how your mother and I used to be. And although I’ll never have that kind of love again, it makes me very happy to know that you have it. And hopefully Lilly will, too, someday.”

  I hear footsteps and it sounds like Pearce is leaving. “Well, I’ll let you finish packing.”

  “What’s that box for?”

  “Oh. Yes, this is for you. Open it.”

  It gets quiet and then I hear Garret again. “Where did you get these? You told me you got rid of them.”

  “Because I didn’t want you to have them. I thought it would help you move on if I told you I destroyed all the photos of her. But it was wrong of me, and again, I’m sorry. Those are yours to keep. I have some others in my office. I kept a few for myself.” He pauses. “I miss her, too, Garret. I have since the moment she was taken from us.” I hear him walking away again. “I’ll see you downstairs.”

  Seconds later, the door to the bathroom opens and Garret walks in. He sees me crouched down on the floor with my tear-stained face.

  He sits next to me. “So I take it you heard all that?”

  “Yeah.” I crawl onto his lap and hug him. He hugs me back, taking deep breaths. We don’t say anything because nothing needs to be said. We just remain there on the floor for several minutes.

  “We should probably get going,” he says.

  “Yeah, okay.” I get up and grab a tissue and go over to the mirror to clean up my face. “I’m a mess. I need to redo my makeup.”

  Garret stands next to me. “You don’t need makeup. You’re beautiful without it. Come on.”

  We go in the bedroom and I see the box Pearce gave to Garret. It’s sitting on the bed and the top is open and inside is a stack of photos.

  “Do you mind if I look at those?” I ask him. “If you don’t want me to, that’s okay.”

  “I forgot that you’ve never seen her before.” Garret takes a photo from the stack and hands it to me. “That was at Easter. I was probably around 5.”

  The photo shows a woman with dark brown hair that falls in loose waves just below her shoulders. She looks tall, maybe 5’9, and has on a sleeveless dress in a soft blue color that matches her light blue eyes. She has a gorgeous face, almost like a model, with a wide smile, high cheekbones, and flawless skin. She has her arms around Garret, who’s standing in front of her. He was a really cute kid. He has a grin on his face that looks both happy and mischievous. He’s wearing a suit for Easter and a blue tie that’s the same color as his mom’s dress.

  “She was beautiful, Garret.” I almost cry seeing the photo, knowing what happened to his mom and how she’d be alive today if it weren’t for the organization.

  “Yeah, she was.” Garret takes the photo back. “You can look at the rest later.” He packs the box in the suitcase and zips it up. “Let’s go say goodbye to Lilly.”

  He takes our luggage and we go downstairs. We each give Lilly a big hug. She’s sad to see us leave but we remind her that we’ll see her in a couple weeks, which seems to make her feel a little better. Pearce and Lilly stand at the door and watch as we drive away, Lilly waving the entire time.

  We head to the airport for the long flight back. As soon as the plane takes off, I fall asleep on Garret’s shoulder and stay asleep for almost the entire flight.

  When we get home we take our stuff inside, then go next door to see Sean and Harper. As we walk in, I notice Sean’s suitcase sitting by the door and for a moment I think maybe she broke up with him and he’s moving out. But she would’ve told me that over the phone.

  “Are you guys going somewhere?” I ask Harper.

  “San Francisco. Just for a few days. Sean got time off from work and he’s never been there so we decided to go.”

  Sean comes down the stairs and over to where we’re standing. “Hey, welcome back.”

  “I was telling them about our trip.” Harper smiles up at Sean and wraps her arm around his waist. He pulls her into his side and kisses her.

  The two of them always look so happy when they’re together. I wish Harper could just admit to herself how much she loves Sean. Maybe it’s not the same love I have for Garret, but it doesn’t have to be. She loves him in her own way and he loves her and that should be enough.

  “You planning to do any surfing while you’re there?” Garret asks Sean.

  “No.” Sean laughs and looks at Harper. “I don’t think Harper would be too happy about that. This is supposed to be a romance trip.”

  Harper rolls her eyes. “It’s not a romance trip. It’s just a little getaway. And don’t worry about the wedding, Jade. Everything’s set. I wouldn’t leave town if it wasn’t.”

  “I’m not worried. And you shouldn’t worry either. I want you to relax and have fun on your trip.”

  “Come upstairs and help me pack.”

  I follow her up to her room but her suitcase is already packed and sitting on the floor.

  “What do you need help with? It looks like you’re ready to go.”

  “I am. I just wanted to talk without the guys around.” She plops down on the bed. “Tell me about your trip.”

  “It was great.” I sit across from her, crossing my legs and leaning back on my hands. “It’s the best time I’ve ever had with Garret’s family. Of course, Katherine wasn’t there, which made a huge difference. I could actually relax without her around.”

  “What about his dad? Was he nice to you?”

  “Really nice. It’s like he’s totally changed. He even hung out with us. Garret thought he’d be at work the whole time, but he didn’t go into the office at all. We had a cookout, went swimming, watched movies. It was like being with a normal family. I hope he keeps it up. I like the new Pearce.”

  “Good, because I didn’t want him ruining your wedding day. It’ll be bad enough having Katherine there.”

  “She’s not coming.” I smile as I say it. “Garret’s dad won’t let her. He told her she couldn’t come unless she was going to be happy for Garret and me. And she isn’t, so she’s not coming.”

  “But what about Lilly? We need a flower girl. I already got this cute little basket for her and—”

  “She’s coming. We told her about being the flower girl and she’s super excited. And while she’s out here, Pearce is taking her to Disneyland.”

  “Seriously? What’s gotten into him?”

  “I don’t know. I think he just misses Garret and it’s made him want to be more of a dad to Lilly.”

  As usual, I can’t tell Harper everything about Garret’s family. And I don’t tell her what happened with Garret’s grandparents. She already knows they aren’t coming to the wedding and when she asked why, I explained how they didn’t approve of Garret marrying someone with my background. But I didn’t tell her how they aren’t even speaking to him now.

  “It’s about time Garret’s dad was nice to you. It’s good if you can get along with your in-laws, at least that’s what my mom always says. She loves my dad’s family so she got lucky.”
>
  “Speaking of in-laws, when are you meeting Sean’s parents?”

  She laughs and moves back on the bed, leaning against the headboard. “They’re not my in-laws, Jade.”

  “They could be. Maybe someday.”

  She shakes her head but she’s smiling, like the idea of marrying Sean makes her happy, which I know it does. She just won’t admit it. “We’re probably going to see them around the middle of August. We talked about it while you guys were gone. Sean wants to stay there for a week so we have time to—” She stops and looks off to the side like she’s thinking.

  “What’s wrong?”

  “I just realized that we’ll miss Garret’s birthday if we go that week. I’ll ask Sean to talk to his parents. Maybe we could go later.”

  “Harper, it’s fine. Just go. We’ll have an early party for him. We’ll do it the week before.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “Totally sure. You know I’m making him dinner, right? Trust me, you don’t want to witness that. It may not even be edible. I’m already trying to come up with a back-up meal in case it doesn’t turn out.”

  “It’ll turn out. You have the best cooking instructor.”

  “Yeah, Sean’s been great. You have to tell me where he likes to buy his cooking supplies. I want to get him a gift card to thank him. So what are you guys going to do at his parents’ house?”

  “We’re not sure yet.”

  Sean’s parents live in New Hampshire on a dairy farm. I can’t imagine Harper hanging out at a dairy farm all week. They’ll have to find stuff to do around town or take some day trips to the mountains. They both like to go hiking.

  “Jade.” I hear Garret calling me from the bottom of the stairs.

  “What?” I call back.

  “Sean and I are going surfing. We’ll see you guys later.”

  I go out in the hall and stand at the top of the stairs. “We just got home. We haven’t even unpacked.”

  “Yeah, I’ll do it later.”

  “But it’s almost dinner time. Don’t you want to eat?”