More to Us Page 24

  "Okay, hold on. Who's 'they'? Who are you talking about?"

  "Her doctor and her physical therapist back in Michigan. The ones who took care of her after the accident."

  Part of me doesn't want to hear this because I have a feeling it's going to be bad, but I need to know.

  "What accident? Tell me what happened."

  "She fell. It happened at a gymnastics meet. It was really bad. So bad it ended her gymnastics career. Gymnastics is all Kira's ever wanted to do. She trained for hours a day, for years. And then one day, in one moment, it all ended." She pauses. "You sure you want to hear this right now? It's been a rough day and if you want to—"

  "Just tell me. Tell me everything."

  She proceeds to go into detail about the day Kira fell. She tells me how Kira slipped off the balance beam and landed wrong and broke her leg in several places, requiring immediate surgery to set the bones back in place. Then she tells me about the months of rehab, and how Kira finished physical therapy just a few weeks before moving here. She was encouraged to stay active in order to continue strengthening her leg, but was told not to overdo it.

  And yet the past month, that's all she's done. Pushing herself in the gym. And I've been there helping her do it.

  "But of course she didn't listen," Amber says, "and now she has two stress fractures."

  "What else could've happened? Do you know?"

  "They said if she put too much force on her leg she might need surgery again. Her mom told me that leg bones take a really long time to heal. And even after your leg feels better, it's still healing, which is why Kira's not supposed to do anything too strenuous. What does she do when she goes to your gym in the morning?"

  "She pushes herself. Uses the heaviest weights she can lift. Always tries to do extra reps."

  "Why did you LET her?" Amber yells at me. "Why didn't you stop her?"

  "Because I didn't freaking know!" I stand up. "I didn't know any of this. Shit, she's in great shape. I thought she was fine. I've been training her, and I told her to slow down but she wouldn't do it."

  "Training her? Why are you training her? You're not a trainer."

  "I'm not certified, but I've been working out long enough to know correct form and how to set up a plan for someone."

  She huffs. "So you basically helped her hurt herself."

  "Fuck! I didn't know, okay? If I'd known I would've stopped her."

  We're both too angry to talk so we take a moment to calm down. But I can't calm down. I'm too pissed. And also worried. What have I done to Kira? Have I been hurting her this whole time? Making her leg worse instead of better? Obviously I have or she wouldn't have two stress fractures right now.

  "Why wasn't she in pain?" I ask Amber. "All those weeks she was pushing herself, why wasn't she in pain?"

  "She probably was. She's good at covering it up. And she's probably been loading up on painkillers."

  "Prescription?"

  "No. Her parents told Kira's doctor not to give her any refills on her prescription because they were worried she might do something like this. So if she's taking something, it's probably something over the counter. And I'm sure she keeps it in her backpack so I can't find it."

  "Why would she do this? Why would she push herself like this, knowing it could hurt her leg?"

  "Because she wants to compete again. She thinks she can go back to being a gymnast."

  "She made it sound like she could. She said it was a long shot but that she was hoping she could at least compete at the college level."

  "It's never going to happen. Kira just refuses to believe that because it means giving up her dream. Gymnastics is her life, or it was before she got hurt. Did she tell you she went to nationals?"

  "Yeah. And she told me she grew up doing gymnastics. But other than that, she really didn't tell me much, and when I'd ask her about it, she'd change the subject, like she didn't want to talk about it."

  "Because she didn't want to tell you why she wasn't competing anymore. She didn't want to tell you the truth."

  "So that I'd train her." I sigh. "I can't believe she did that."

  "I don't think that's the only reason. I think she just didn't want you to know. She's not really over it. Like I said, she tries to pretend it never happened."

  I'm quiet, not sure how to respond. I'm still trying to process the fact that Kira hid this from me. I've seen her every day for over a month. We've spent hours talking, more time than I've ever spent talking to a girl. And yet she never told me this. She said she hurt her leg, but acted like it was nothing.

  "I hope this doesn't end things for you guys," Amber says, "but if it does, then maybe it's for the best. I don't think it's good for Kira to be around someone who's as obsessed with working out as she is."

  "I'm not obsessed. And if I'd known what she was doing, I swear to you, I would've put an end to it."

  She nods, but I don't think she believes me.

  "Did you call her parents?" I ask.

  "No. Kira did. I threatened to call them if she didn't, so she called them herself."

  "Are they coming here?"

  "Her mom is coming but not until next week. Her dad is at some convention in California so her mom has to stay home with her brothers. But her parents talked to the doctor and got whatever information they needed. Then her mom and I talked. I told her I'd take care of Kira." She stands up. "I'll be right back." She goes in her room and returns with her laptop. "This is hard to watch but I think you need to see it."

  She gives me the laptop and clicks on a video. It shows Kira on the balance beam, doing a routine. I don't know anything about gymnastics but Kira looks like a pro, like one of those girls in the Olympics, flipping in the air and landing on that narrow beam like it's no effort at all. I watch her do another flip and then see her foot slip when she goes to land. It happens so fast she can't catch herself and her body crashes to the ground. She lands on the mat, but she hit the ground with a lot of force and at an awkward angle, causing her leg to twist and snap. I even heard the snap and can see part of the bone sticking out.

  "Holy shit," I say, looking away. I glance back when I hear Amber screaming on the video, crying out Kira's name. I see her crouched down beside Kira, sobbing, quickly joined by a man and woman who I assume are Kira's parents. Kira is passed out on the mat as people run over to help.

  Amber shuts the video off, and when I look at her, she has tears running down her face. She wipes them away. "Sorry. It makes me cry every time."

  "Yeah," I say quietly. "I see why it would."

  "I thought she was dead." She sniffles and wipes her face again. "I saw her there not moving, and I was so scared." She takes her laptop from me. "I just thought you should see that. So when she says her injury wasn't a big deal, don't believe her. It WAS a big deal."

  "What happened after that? After she got to the hospital?"

  "They took her into surgery. Set the bones back in place. The bone that was sticking out damaged some of the surrounding tissue. The doctor said it was unusual to see that much damage from a fall that was from only a few feet up, but when he saw the video, he said it was because of the way she hit the ground. She hit at an odd angle and that's why her leg twisted like that."

  "How long did it take for her leg to heal?"

  "All of last year. She spent most of it in physical therapy. But her leg's still not strong enough to go back to gymnastics, or do any kind of strenuous exercise, like lifting heavy weights. Her leg can't handle that kind of force."

  And here I've been pushing her at the gym. Having her do more reps with heavier weights. It's what she told me she wanted, so I did it, not knowing I was putting her at risk.

  I feel a tight knot in my stomach knowing I did that. Knowing I hurt her. How could she let me do that? She knows how much I care about her, and she purposely made me do something that was hurting her. Fuck, that pisses me off.

  "That's why I've been trying to keep an eye on her," Amber continues. "When Kira wants s
omething, it's nearly impossible to stop her. And I know how badly she wants to compete again. But it's over. She's done with gymnastics. But when I tell her that, she won't listen to me. She won't listen to anyone when it comes to that." She sniffles and coughs. "Sorry, Austin, but I don't feel well. I need to try and get some sleep. You gonna stay here?"

  "Yeah. I need to talk to her."

  Amber goes to her room. I remain in the living room, pacing the floor, waiting for Kira to wake up.

  I knew something would happen to ruin things between us. I just had that feeling. And now here it is. Kira lied to me, and put herself at risk, and let me help her do it without me even knowing it.

  I like Kira, maybe even love her, but I don't know if I can get past this. Trust is everything to me, and now, I don't know if I'll ever be able to trust her. After finding this out, our relationship may be coming to an end.

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Kira

  I wake up when I hear Amber's door close. She must be going in there to rest. She wasn't feeling well when we were at the hospital and yet she stayed with me the whole time. I didn't tell her what happened. With everything else going on, I couldn't handle one of her lectures. But I know I'll get one later when I tell her I've been training with Austin. She's going to be furious at me for not telling her the truth, but she'll get over it.

  But I'm afraid Austin won't. I wasn't honest with him, even after he repeatedly told me how important honesty is to him. I'm hoping he'll forgive me, but I don't know if he will. I still don't want to tell him about the accident, but I know if I don't, that Amber will, and I'd rather have him hear it from me.

  I throw the covers back and look down at my leg. There's a big ugly boot wrapped around my calf. Two stress fractures caused by overuse. That's what the doctor said. I pushed myself too hard. My leg wasn't ready for all the force I put on it and now I can't work out again until it's healed.

  My leg is throbbing. It's time to take another pain pill but my glass of water is empty. I'll have to go to the kitchen. I take my crutches from the side of the bed. I only have to use them for a week or two but I already hate them. They just remind me of all the months I spent hobbling around on the damn things as I waited for my leg to heal.

  When I get to the kitchen I see Austin sitting on the couch. He has his back to me and he's leaning over, staring down at the floor.

  What is he doing here? And why didn't Amber tell me she let him in? I don't want to talk to him right now. I'm not ready to. But he's right there and I can't avoid him.

  "Austin?"

  He stands up and turns around. "Kira. What are you doing? Shouldn't you be in bed?"

  "The doctor said I need to get up and move around. It helps with the blood flow." I hold up my pain pills. "And I needed some water so I could take this."

  He hurries over to the kitchen. "I'll get it." He grabs a glass from the cupboard.

  "Thanks, but I can do it myself." I lift up one of the crutches. "I'm pretty good with these."

  "Maybe I just wanted to help," He fills the glass with water and hands it to me.

  I half-smile. "Thanks." I take my pill, then nod toward the couch. "Do you want to go sit down?"

  He agrees to it, then watches as I make my way over there on the crutches. I'm feeling sick to my stomach because he's not acting like himself. He's quiet and distant and seems mad. I get why he's mad. I pushed him away. Made him leave the hospital. But I just couldn't have him there. I didn't want him seeing me like that. Weak and injured, and not the strong athlete he thinks I am. But I'm going to get that side of me back. I just need more time.

  Once I'm seated on the couch, he sits down on the chair that's next to it. So he won't even sit next to me. That's not good.

  "How are you feeling?" he asks with zero emotion in his voice. It's a tone I've never heard him use before.

  "Better. It was just a stress fracture. Well, two. But at least it wasn't broken."

  "How long before it heals?"

  "A few weeks. I won't need the crutches the whole time, but I'll have to wear the boot for a while."

  He's quiet again, staring at me. I don't know what to say to him.

  After a few moments of awkward silence, he folds his arms over his chest and asks, "Were you ever going to tell me?"

  "Tell you what?"

  He huffs as his shoulders shrug. "I don't know where to begin. How about we start with Dylan? Anything you want to tell me?"

  "About Dylan?" I'm surprised by his question. I thought he was going to ask about my leg. "Why would I have anything to tell you about Dylan? He's your friend, not mine."

  "Oh. So because he's my friend and not yours, you thought it was okay to lie to him?"

  I'm feeling nervous, anxious, my heart beating fast. What's going on here? Why is he asking about Dylan? Shit. I promised Amber I wouldn't say anything.

  "I'm not lying to Dylan," I say. "I don't know what you mean."

  He stares at me, his arms still crossed. "Amber. Your roommate, Amber."

  "What about her?"

  "Fuck." He stands up and walks over to the window. "You're still not going to tell me? I basically told you I already know and you still won't admit it?"

  So he knows about Amber. She told me not to tell him so I didn't. So who did?

  "Amber asked me not to tell you," I say.

  I see his jaw clench as he gazes out the window at the cloudy sky. "Dylan's one of my closest friends. He's spent hours, weeks, months trying to find her. And you knew this. You knew he hasn't been able to move on. And this whole time you were living with her and said nothing." He looks at me, anger in his eyes. "I don't give a shit if she told you not to tell me. This is something that needs to be told. It's completely stupid to keep this a secret."

  "Oh, so now I'm stupid?" I feel my own anger ramping up. I don't like his tone and the way he's looking at me, like he thinks I did this to hurt his friend.

  "I didn't say you were stupid. I said keeping this a secret was stupid. You knew how much Dylan wanted to find her. You knew how much he's struggled to get over her."

  "He's dating the head cheerleader for his college's football team," I remind him. "That doesn't seem like struggling."

  Dylan started dating that girl a couple weeks ago. I've only met her one time. She's gorgeous, like model gorgeous, with blond hair, bright blue eyes, and a great body. Actually, now that I think about it, she kind of looks like Amber. Is that why Dylan is dating her? Because she reminds him of Amber?

  "He's only dating Allison because he had to move on," Austin says. "He couldn't keep waiting the rest of his life for Amber. He already wasted five months searching for her, and it turns out, she's been here the whole time, living with my girlfriend." He turns back to the window and I see his neck move as he swallows.

  "How did you find out?" I ask quietly.

  "Amber told me. You were sleeping when I got here so Amber and I were talking. She thought I already knew, and when I told her I didn't, it was too late. She had to tell me."

  "I wanted to tell you, Austin. I really did. But Amber is my best friend. She begged me not to say anything, so I didn't."

  "And you and I aren't friends? After all the time we've spent together? All the late night talks? You still don't consider us friends?"

  "Of course I do. You're more than a friend. But I didn't want to betray Amber."

  "So you betrayed me. And Dylan."

  "I'm sorry, okay? I thought I was doing the right thing. Amber has Matt, and I knew Dylan would find someone else. He has a million girls wanting to go out with him. I knew he'd eventually give up on Amber. And he did."

  "He hasn't given up on her," Austin mutters, gazing out the window at the darkening sky. "Just last week, I caught him searching her name on the Internet. He shut it down when he saw me looking, but I already saw the search. He typed in Amber's name and New York."

  "Then tell him. Just tell him she's here."

  "I will. But first we have some other things
to discuss."

  I feel the heaviness in the air. I don't know what he's about to say but I just want him to say it and get it over with because I'm feeling really sick right now. I don't like this. I don't like the way he's acting or his tone or the fact that he's keeping his distance and won't even touch me. He's always touching me when we're together, even if it's just holding my hand. But now? Nothing.

  "Kira." He sighs and drops his head. "Why can't you be honest with me?"

  "I HAVE been honest with you. I—"

  "You haven't. You haven't been honest. Just admit it."

  "Are we still talking about Dylan? Because there isn't anything else to say. You already know the truth."

  His head lifts and he looks me in the eye. "What else haven't you told me?"

  I swallow and glance away, my heart pounding.

  "What about your leg?" he asks.

  I look back at him. "I told you I hurt my leg. I never lied about that."

  "And that's all you have to say about it?"

  "What else is there to say? I broke my leg. It happened over a year ago."

  "And it wasn't a big deal," he says. "Isn't that what you said?"

  "Yes."

  "So that's it? That's all you're going to tell me?"

  I know I should tell him what really happened but I don't want to. And I don't need to. I already told him I broke my leg. I just didn't tell him how bad it was, because if I did, he'd treat me like Amber does, and my parents, and everyone else who knows what happened that day. He'd never work out with me again. He wouldn't race me on the bike. He'd be constantly telling me to rest my leg. Asking me if it hurts.

  I'm tired of being treated that way. I'm an athlete. A gymnast. Not some girl with a broken leg. This latest injury is just a minor setback. My leg will heal and then I'll go back to getting in shape. I'm not letting the doctors or Amber or my parents tell me my dream is over. And I'm not letting Austin do it either.

  "I already told you everything," I say. "There's nothing more to say."

  He stares back at me, then mutters, "Fuck." He looks out the window again. "I can't believe you're doing this. I thought we—forget it. Guess I was wrong." He turns and walks away, heading to the door.