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  I nod. "Yeah."

  "Call me if you need anything."

  "I will. Bye." I shove my phone in my pocket.

  "Can you take this up there?" Kira hands me the clipboard with the insurance forms. I bring it up to the nurse's station, then sit down by Kira again. I'm anxious and fidgety, my foot tapping on the floor.

  Kira puts her hand over mine. "Austin, stop worrying. I'll be fine."

  I shake my head. "I never should've made you do those extra reps."

  "It's not your fault."

  "It IS my fault." I look at her. "I should've made you stop, but I didn't, and now you're in the emergency room."

  I'm so pissed at myself right now. Why did I listen to her? I knew she was pushing herself too hard and yet I let her do it. Why the hell did I let her do it?

  "How bad is the pain?" I ask.

  "Not as bad as it was."

  "Is it your whole leg or just part of it?"

  "Austin, I don't want to talk about it. Can we talk about something else?"

  I hear a kid crying and look up and see a young girl, also in a wheelchair with her leg up. Her parents are trying to calm her down.

  "You need to call your parents," I tell Kira.

  "No. They don't need to know."

  "They wouldn't want to know their daughter's in the hospital?"

  She doesn't answer.

  "Kira, I'm serious. Call them."

  "I'm not calling them," she bites out.

  "Why wouldn't you call them? You're in the emergency room. Your family needs to know."

  "I'm an adult. They don't need to know."

  "You're on their insurance. They're gonna find out."

  "Shit," she mutters. "Then I'll tell them later. They don't need to know right now."

  What is her problem? Why wouldn't she tell her parents?

  "You need to at least call Amber," I say.

  "She's in class."

  "Then text her."

  "Stop telling me what to do," she whispers, glaring at me.

  I sigh and sit back in the chair, my foot still tapping the floor. I'm so tense right now. I'm angry that Kira got injured, frustrated I can't help her, and worried she's hurt more than she's telling me.

  "Austin." She threads her hand in mine. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to yell at you. I'm just in pain and when I'm not feeling good, I get cranky."

  "Hey." I lean over and kiss her. "I understand. I just wish I could do something."

  "Kira Jacobs?" the nurse says.

  Kira raises her hand. "Right here."

  I stand up as the nurse comes over.

  "I want to go alone," Kira says to me.

  "You don't want me coming with?"

  "No. Besides, you need to get to work."

  "I'm not going to work."

  "Austin, just go. Amber can pick me up later."

  "Are you kidding? I'm not leaving. You're my girlfriend and you're in the freaking hospital."

  The nurse starts wheeling Kira away. I follow beside them.

  "I'll call you later, okay?" Kira says.

  "No, it's not okay. I'm not leaving you."

  The nurse stops as we reach the door that leads to the exam area. "Is he coming with?"

  "No," Kira says, looking at me. "Austin, I'm sorry, but I need to do this alone." She nods at the nurse to continue through the door.

  I'm left standing there, confused, wondering what the hell just happened. Why is she shutting me out like this? Why would she want me to leave? Why wouldn't she want me with her?

  I call Amber. I don't give a shit if Kira gets mad about it. Maybe Amber can figure out why Kira's acting this way.

  "Hello?" she answers. She doesn't sound right. Her voice is hoarse and lower than normal.

  "Hey, it's Austin. Are you in class?"

  "No. I'm not going today. I'm sick. Have you seen Kira? She's usually home by now."

  "She's at the hospital."

  "What?" I hear the phone drop on something, then hear her voice again. "Kira's at the hospital?"

  "Yeah. She hurt her leg. We're in the ER. They just took her to be examined."

  "Okay, I'll be there in a minute. Which hospital?"

  I give her the name and directions, and a half hour later she shows up.

  "Any news?" she asks when she sees me.

  "The nurse said they're taking her for x-rays, then they have to wait for a doctor. She said it could be a couple hours."

  "Seriously?" She sits down next to me. "Why are these places always so damn slow? And why don't they ever tell you anything?"

  "I don't know." I glance at the door that Kira went through. I haven't seen anyone come out of there the whole time I've been waiting.

  "It's just like when she fell," Amber says. "She was unconscious and they took forever to tell us anything."

  I turn to Amber. "She was unconscious?"

  "Yeah. We all thought she had a brain injury but then they told us she passed out from the pain."

  "When did this happen?"

  "When she broke her leg. She told you about the accident, right?"

  "Not really. She said she broke her leg but that it wasn't a big deal."

  "Oh." Amber looks down.

  "What? What are you not telling me?"

  Her phone rings. "Shit, I was supposed to turn this off." She goes to shut it down but then says, "It's Kira." She gets up and races outside to answer it. I follow her, but can't tell what Kira is saying. Amber just keeps nodding as she listens. "Okay, bye."

  "What'd she say?"

  "She's waiting to see a doctor. She wants me to go in there and wait with her. They only allow one person back there so she said you should just go to work."

  Now I'm really getting angry. "What the fuck is going on here? Why does she keep telling me to leave?"

  Amber looks down at her phone, then back at me. "I'm sorry. I didn't know she didn't tell you."

  "Tell me what?"

  She glances at the hospital door. "I have to get in there. Can we talk later?"

  "No. We're talking now."

  "I don't have time to explain it."

  "Then give me the short version." I say, crossing my arms over my chest.

  She sighs. "When Kira told you it wasn't a big deal when she hurt her leg, she lied. It WAS a big deal. It was a HUGE deal. She got hurt really bad."

  Fuck. I had a feeling Kira was hiding something from me. I just didn't know what.

  "I can tell you more later," Amber says. "Kira said they'd be sending her home in a few hours. I'll give you a call when we're back."

  "I need to know what's wrong with her. I'm not leaving until I know."

  "She said they think it's a stress fracture. They did an x-ray but they're doing an MRI to confirm it."

  "Stress fracture. So that's not that bad, right?"

  "No. I had one in my foot when I did gymnastics. I just had to wear one of those boots for a few weeks. But they do hurt a lot, at least mine did. It sounds like she has stress fractures in two places so I'm guessing that's why she's in so much pain. Austin, I really need to go. I told her I'd be right in."

  "And what about me?"

  She glances down, not saying anything.

  "Kira really told you to send me away?"

  Amber nods. "I'm sorry."

  "It's not your fault," I say quietly.

  "I'll call you later." She goes in the hospital and I remain outside.

  I can't fucking believe this. Kira wants me to leave? This doesn't even make sense. Why would she push me away like this?

  Everything was going so great between us, and now I find out she's been hiding this secret. I don't even know the whole story but I'm still pissed. Why would she hide this from me? I've told her everything about me, even things my own family doesn't know. And then I find out she hasn't been truthful about herself.

  I guess I should've listened to my gut. I had a feeling something would go wrong between us. And now it has.

  Chapter Twenty-Two


  Austin

  "Hey," I say as Amber greets me at the door. It's just after three. She called me an hour ago to tell me she was back at the apartment with Kira.

  I haven't heard anything from Kira. Not even a text. I've called her, texted her, but heard nothing back. It pisses me off, and yet I still want to see her. I have to know she's okay. Amber told me the doctor confirmed that Kira has two stress fractures in her lower leg. He said she'll be fine, but I need to see for myself that she is, and then we have to talk. I need Kira to explain what really happened to her and why she hid it from me.

  "Hi." Amber steps aside, letting me in the apartment. She's sniffling and coughing and seems even sicker than she was this morning.

  "Is Kira in her room?"

  "Yeah, but she's asleep. They gave her some painkillers that make her tired. She'll probably be out for at least an hour. But I thought you should come over now so we could talk."

  "I'd rather hear this from Kira."

  "She won't tell you. She refuses to talk about it, even with me. She likes to pretend it never happened." Amber goes over to the couch and sits down, hugging one of the throw pillows and resting her head on it, looking tired and like she doesn't feel well. "You want to sit down?"

  I go over and sit on the pink recliner that's next to the couch. It belonged to Amber's grandma. I never sit on it, but I don't want to sit on the couch next to Amber and risk getting whatever illness she has.

  "So, um, we never get to talk so I want to start by saying thanks for not saying anything to Dylan."

  "About what?"

  "Me." She sniffles, slouching into the couch, then suddenly straightens up and looks at me. "You didn't tell him, right?"

  "Tell him what? I don't know what you're talking about."

  "That I'm here in town. And that you know me." She pauses. "Wait. Didn't Kira tell you?"

  "Um...I'm still not sure what you're talking about."

  "Oh." She looks down at the pillow she's holding. "I just assumed she told you. I mean, I asked her not to, but you two are so close, and you're together all the time. I just assumed she told you and asked you not to say anything to Dylan."

  That nagging feeling is creeping up again and I really don't like it. What else did Kira hide from me?

  "What did you think Kira told me?" I ask. "Something about Dylan?"

  She nods. "Yeah. I thought you knew."

  "Knew what?" I move to the edge of the chair. "What's going on?"

  She looks at me and sighs. "If I tell you, you have to promise not to tell him."

  Now I'm feeling anxious and a little sick to my stomach. "I can't promise you that until I know what you're talking about. Dylan's one of my closest friends. I'm not going to hide something from him if it's something he needs to know."

  "Is he dating someone?"

  "Yeah. Why?"

  She shrugs. "I just wondered." She sniffles. "It's good. It's good he's dating someone."

  "Would you just tell me what the hell's going on?"

  She hesitates, then says, "I'm her. I'm Amber."

  "I know you're Amber but what does that—" I stop, realizing what she means. Holy shit. She's the girl? No freaking way. Kira would've told me that. Wouldn't she?

  "Austin, did you hear me?"

  "Yeah. So um, you're saying you're THE Amber? The one from last May? The one he wrote the song about?"

  "Yeah," she says quietly. "It was only supposed to be a one-night thing so I told him I'd just graduated from college and was moving to New York. I only said it because I didn't want him trying to contact me."

  "Why? Was the night that bad? Because Dylan makes it sound like—"

  "It wasn't bad." She looks down at the couch. "It was amazing. The best night of my life."

  "Then why did you do that? Why did you disappear like that?"

  "Because I wanted the memory of that night to never change. I didn't want to date him and then break up with him later and tarnish what we had together that night."

  That makes absolutely no sense, but maybe to a girl it does. Actually, no, it doesn't make sense to a girl or a guy. It's completely illogical.

  "Amber, you need to tell him. Dylan's been looking for you for months. He never got your last name so he's just been searching for Ambers who live in New York. You know how many hours he's spent trying to find you?"

  She sniffles, and this time I don't think it's from her illness. Her eyes are red like she's about to cry. "I didn't know he was looking for me. I knew he wrote the song but..." She sniffles again. "I didn't mean to hurt him. I really didn't. After that night, I thought he'd forget all about me. But then Kira told me about that song and I...I didn't know what to do. I had no idea that night meant as much to him as it did to me."

  Listening to her, I'm getting really angry. Angry that she let Dylan suffer for months, knowing he wanted her back. If she didn't want to date him, she could've at least called and told him. I'm also angry at Kira. Why didn't she tell me this? She knows Dylan has been looking for Amber, and this whole time, Kira's been living with her and never said anything.

  "This is bullshit," I say, getting up. "I can't believe you'd do this to him. There's no way I'm keeping this a secret." I huff. "But don't worry. I'm sure when he finds out what you did, he won't want to date you."

  Maybe that was mean to say, but it's true. Dylan won't want to date her after finding this out.

  "Austin, I told you, I wasn't hiding this from Dylan in order to hurt him. When I found out he wanted to see me, I just couldn't do it. I was worried if I saw him again, I'd want to be with him."

  "Yeah? So what's wrong with that? Isn't that what you both want?"

  "I'm dating Matt. And I was dating him when I found out about Dylan."

  I sit down again. "No offense, but I don't really see you and Matt lasting as a couple. I'm not trying to be mean. I'm just being honest."

  "I didn't ask for your opinion," she snaps, tossing the pillow aside. "You don't even know Matt. Or me. So you shouldn't be making comments about us."

  "Fine. But I know Dylan, and I know he really liked you. Hell, maybe even loved you. The way the guy talks about you, you'd think—never mind. The point is, you never should've lied to him. If you didn't want to see him again, you could've just told me and I would've relayed the message."

  "But I DO want to see him again."

  "What?" I stare at her. "You just said you didn't. Make up your freaking mind."

  She lets out a long sigh. "I know you won't understand this, but that night was like a fairytale to me. A fantasy. Something I know I'll never have again. So I don't want to ruin it by dating Dylan."

  "How would dating him ruin a memory? That doesn't even make sense."

  "Memories are always ruined when the people who are part of them screw up and do something that makes you no longer like them—or worse, hate them."

  "I doubt that would happen. Dylan's a good guy. He treats girls well. He doesn't cheat."

  "That doesn't mean it would end well if we were dating."

  "It already HASN'T ended well. You're both miserable. And who says it would have to end? Shit, maybe you'll date for years. Maybe you'll end up marrying him. Have five kids. Who the hell knows? But you'll never find out unless you give him a chance. Actually, forget that. None of that's gonna happen because he'll be too pissed at you when he finds out."

  "I'm sorry," she mutters, then closes her eyes and sniffles again.

  I'm not trying to make her feel bad, but what she did was fucking mean. So maybe I do want her to feel bad. She made Dylan feel bad for months.

  We sit there in silence. I need a moment to calm down. I'm so freaking angry. I was already angry at Kira, but then I found out about Amber and now I'm angry with both of them.

  "So how did this happen?" Amber asks.

  "How did what happen?"

  "What happened to Kira? She wouldn't tell me."

  "What do you mean she wouldn't tell you? You were at the hospital that whole time and s
he didn't tell you?"

  "No. She said she'd tell me later. But I'm guessing it happened when you went walking with her?"

  "Walking? No, we were at the gym."

  "What gym? The one on campus?"

  "No. My gym."

  "Your gym?" Amber coughs, then wipes her nose on the sleeve of her sweatshirt. "What are you talking about?"

  "Kira belongs to my gym. It's across town. She takes the bus there every morning. We usually meet there at five-thirty or six."

  She shuts her eyes and whispers, "Oh my God. Kira. No."

  "What? She didn't tell you?"

  "No." She opens her eyes. "Kira told me she was walking. She used to always like going on early morning walks with her mom. She never said she was going to a gym." Amber rubs her forehead. "So she's been going to the gym twice a day. No wonder she hurt herself."

  "Twice a day? What do you mean she goes twice a day?"

  "Kira always goes to the gym after class," Amber says, sniffling.

  "What gym?"

  "The gym on campus. You didn't know that?"

  "No. I thought she was just going to my gym."

  I'm getting that nagging feeling again and it's even worse than before. Why wouldn't Kira tell me she works out at the campus gym? And why was she working out twice a day? I've been pushing her hard for weeks. One workout a day was more than enough.

  "I should've kept a closer eye on her," Amber says. "I knew she'd do this but she kept telling me she wouldn't."

  "Do what? What do you mean?"

  "She wants to train as if she's still competing. But she's not supposed to do that. She's only supposed to do moderate exercise, like walking or jogging. I thought she was walking every morning, but now you're telling me she's been going to your gym. She lied to me."

  "She lied to me too," I mutter. "So what does she do at the other gym? The one she goes to in the afternoon?"

  "I'm not sure but I think she does mostly cardio. Don't tell her this, but sometimes I'd sneak into the campus gym to spy on her, just to make sure she's not overdoing it. I'd usually see her on one of the bikes, or on the elliptical, so I wasn't worried. She's allowed to do that stuff. She can also lift weights as long as they're not too heavy, but she's only supposed to lift twice a week. They told her she's not supposed to do any more than that. What does she do at the other gym?"